D-Fence
Let's us get a few things straight, Mr. Binghampton. Your outlet for man-on-man agression has obviously been sublimated in the wake of the recent slackening of the our hectic gridiron confrontations. According to tradition, your second seems to have chosen blog-smack as the new weapon of choice. Kudos. A fine sidearm it is. Howevs, your initial volley hath fallen well short of the target. I mean, seriously, the man who can't take a punch is going to pose a challenge to the guy with the hottest girlfriend in all of college basketball? I thinkn't.
Your five points were quaint, and mildly amusing. But that's it? Oh, you were finished? Well, then allow me to retort!
- Ok, I'm not really sure why Corvette's belong on an isthmus? But damn, don't they look good there! Proof positive that isthmuses (isthmi?) are rad. Also? I saw a Lamborghini Countach the other day in Chapel Hill. Radmobile.
- Yes, it is undeniably cold in Madison. I remember once in college when it was so cold that they cancelled classes for the day. Weather dudes told us that it was so cold that the tears in your eyes could freeze. No joke. And that's "Athletic Director Barry Alvarez" to you, Mr. Binghampton.
- Other famous Madisonians? Garbage. That dude from "The West Wing." And the late, lamented Chris Farley. Plus, Lake Mendota has the dubious honor as being "The Lake That Killed Otis Redding."
- I'm offended at any accusations of Canadianness, or any fealty to our French-lookin' neighbors to the north. See here for a measured, reasonable, fact-based listing of greivances against Canada. Here's a taste:
I know a Canadian and he hads shifty eyes. They are a society funded on lies because they call ham Canadian Bacon when they know it's just ham. Canada outlaws Howard Stern and took him off of the radio because they are scared of free thought. Canada has cheap prescription drugs to lure our elderly over the boarder . . . then they rape them. That last sentence is a true story, look it up in USA Today, it happens all the time.
5. And finally, it comes down to racism. Now, I know that you're still upset about the whole "reign of William of Orange" thing, and I can understand that. I mean, the Dutch kicked your ass. Hard. And that's gotta hurt, y'know, cos of the wooden shoes and all. Look, it takes more than whiskey and popery to get rid of us Dutchmen. And wooden shoes make you run fast and jump high.
Thus: Badgers 64- Wusspack 48. On, Wisconsin!